When I walked into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous on May 31, 2019, I wasn’t fully convinced it would work for me.  I had no idea how it all worked, I was nervous, and most importantly I didn’t want to stop using.  I’ve always believed that things happen for a reason, but this program has really made that notion clear for me.  I happened to be put in touch with a family friend who has been sober for 30 years, one day at a time.  He’s the one that introduced me to the Chappaqua group.  That was my first AA meeting.  I didn’t want to be there but as soon as the meeting started and I heard people’s shares, one after another, I was in awe (and crying profusely).  The signs in the room didn’t make sense to me, the laughter and smiles didn’t make sense to me either, but one thing that was made clear is that these people were saying what I was feeling inside my heart.  As I mentioned, I wasn’t ready to put down the drink or the drug that day, but I knew I was tired of living the life I had.  I pulled up the meeting guide app later that night and decided since I have no job, no friends, and all the time in the world maybe I’ll fill my time with meetings just to research further if this is what I want to do.  I found Armonk and, somehow, I managed to treat that as an outpatient and go to meetings every single day.  I found a wonderful group of strong and joyful sober women including my two amazing sponsors I’ve had so far.  I soon learned that Alcoholics Anonymous isn’t just a bunch of people talking about their problems, it is a solution-based program with steps that you work while building a faith in a power bigger than myself to guide me through life on a daily basis and free me from my own insanity.  Mind blown.  I chased my addiction like a full-time job plus overtime, and that is how I have chased my recovery – every single day since I started going to meetings.  AA has allowed me to be free of what once felt like being in a jail inside my own head.  I have the gift of serenity now instead of living in constant fear, shame, and anxiety that active addiction brought me.  I have awareness and accountability in my life and most importantly I am present in my life, my family’s life, and for others on a daily basis.  This new life that has been given to me so freely, is something I will never be able to repay in any monetary amount, which is why I keep coming every single day and carrying the message to the next alcoholic.